My Rule 4

Happy Saturday!

Alex left for Atlanta yesterday for track fun today at #atlantamotorsportspark #AMP

I chose to stay here in #stpetersburg #ilovestpete for two reasons.

1. My body is still recovering from the move. As you know I have a rare disease which causes the body to take on motion. I have to assess each adventure based on pros and cons on how my body will respond and if I can afford the recovery my body needs to restabilize. 8 hours in car Saturday, 7 hours in heat watching the guys especially Alex Pilson have their track fun, and then 8 hours back will significantly impact and weaken my body and throw me backwards in weight training and gaining new clients.
2. I needed a little me, myself, and I time to check in with myself.

The stresses with ex husband, the financial stresses from life changes and covid times,, and relationship stresses from financial stresses are real.

And just as I had my 4 weeks of me, myself, and I time a few months back- it was again needed- we all need personal check ins. They are super important to the health and continued growth of your relationships.

It’s very easy to refrain from looking in the mirror and place blame, shame, and guilt elsewhere.

Constructive conversation is healing. Harsh words and judgemebt divide- push people away.

When I shut down or am shut down- I shut down! I internalize and push away

I wrote a while ago how I never like to bring negative energy to anyone. There are those who like to pull others into their negative space because it makes them feel better and there are others, like me, who retreat and keep inward to not infect- or add gas to a fire.

For instance, I could focus on and post everyday about how much it sucks to live in motion. About how my current financial situation sucks as a result of learning how to live in motion and all the changes it created.

What would that focus bring me?

Nothing good!

What we focus on expands- PERIOD!

I am happy, in spite of the disease and broke times…and learning to be happy- truly happy within yourself is a powerful place to be.

A relationship does not determine my happiness. That includes relationships of any kind.

I continue to work on me as working on oneself is a lifelong journey!

One that will never ends… as we are either moving forward or backwards there is really no standing still.

Part of that is defining one’s boundaries for who has the privilege of being in your life and witness to your journey.

To join you at your table.

My boundaries are getting more and more defined.

Like I just do not have space for closed minded people who cannot carry mature conversations, I do not have space for people that are all about using your time for their benefit and the moment you start to share they always have to go-

I call these people users;

and I don’t have space for people who are only there in good times and distance themselves when you need them most;

and I have zero space for negative people.

And I refuse to fight dirty. Again, I prefer mature healthy constructive conversation that shows mutual respect and love- not hate.

If you are not in my corner, get out of my fucking ring.

My rule number 4 to living a healthy and fit life.

Self reflection through journaling daily and maybe the occasional me, myself, and I time.

For self accountability, ownership, clarity, forgiveness, and release.

Forgiveness of oneself and others you think wronged you or played any part in hurting you.

And Boundaries!

Self accountability, responsibility, and ownership for our own well being- mental well being and this includes assessing who we allow to have headspace in our brains and why.

Sometimes as much as we want a relationship with a friend or family member etc it is not a healthy place to be because they are still living in selfish mode- and I am not talking Self care for self love mode- I am talking selfish mode, they are in mode that their behavior and actions are not their fault but rather the fault of others, and they blame everything bad in their life on their parents, or past relationships, etc. They are not healthy, therefore, they are not capable of a healthy relationship.

Remember air mask goes on you first- others second.