“She’s everything I’m Insecure About”

“And you’re probably with that blonde girl

Who always made me doubt

She’s so much older than me

She’s everything I’m insecure about”

Lyrics from Drivers License by Olivia Rodrigo

Yes, to know me is to know that I love music… and that includes singing and dancing my heart out. The singing usually takes place during my alone time- where I can pretend I have a voice others might would want to hear lol.

Singing lessons is on my living life list!! This girl happens to think she could carry a note with some direction.

Dancing, well, happens just about anywhere anytime I hear a song that moves me. I am just not afraid to embarrass myself.

What I love most about music is lyrics. I tend to attach songs based on lyrics to memories and even to moments or feelings I have or have had that a song surfaces.

One of my favorite songs right now (hard to pick just one) is Drivers License by Olivia Rodrigo.

I am a sucker for a good love song…

This is a sad love song where her love has moved on. The lyrics that grab me the most have absolutely nothing to do with her love for him or his love for her and everything to do with her #selflove and insecurities.

“And you’re probably with that blonde girl

Who always made me doubt

She’s so much older than me

She’s everything I’m insecure about”

Why do these lyrics grab my attention so? Well, I have been writing a lot about #selfcare #selflove #selfesteem #selfconfidence #bodypositivity and how we tend to stay in comfort zones by surrounding ourselves with others (in person and online) that keep us right where we are and even validate our reasons and excuses for why we do not make change to better our health and fitness under the pretense of body positivity and one accepting themselves as they are.

Why does this rub me the wrong way? There are so many reasons!

What does accepting oneself mean? I do not think accepting oneself means remaining in poor health and fitness.

Most are not born in poor health and fitness or with any ailment that would hinder great health and fitness. There are very few people that develop true medical cause for excess body fat and weight issues. Most weight/ fat issues are self inflicted. Because they are self inflicted they can be self corrected.

I have communicated often that most damage inflicted from poor health and fitness habits, and even ailments or diseases that develop can be cured and/ or managed for high quality of life with good health an fitness habits.

Yes, we create habits that support poor health and fitness just as we create habits that support excellent health and fitness. Accountability is likely necessary to redirect poor habits with good habits. Accountability is likely necessary to engage in proper exercise aka weight training and proper form… also proper challenge.

What we have to remind ourselves of is we will have friends and family that get very uncomfortable when we make change to better ourselves because they do not want to make change to better themselves. In fact, when we make change to better ourselves we may even have friends and/ or family that will do everything in their power to sabotage our efforts because they take comfort in our poor health and fitness.

I have written about the new trend on instagram (BTW hope you are following me on Instagram OBAB.Alexis) which is posting unflattering photos in the name of #bodypositivity.

That’s right, to combat body shaming there is a new wave of influencers that, in essence, shame those who pose to show their best self, maybe use filters (pretty much all professional photos are edited), and present perfection (perfection is their opinion).

There is no such thing as perfection!

No one is perfect!

Women are much more critical of their own appearance and the appearance of other woman than a man is of a woman. Men tend to appreciate a variety. Men see woman in a far better light than woman see themselves.

In real life and in social media life, people tend to judge or think they are judging based on their ethics and morals. Yes, I think many project their beliefs to cast judgement against anything they deem inappropriate. They have little or no flexibility in thought to open their mind to possibility and different beliefs. They are restrained by what they have been taught is right or wrong.

AND I think most make judgement and create gossip out of insecurity. “She’s everything I’m insecure about” … we can replace the she with they.

We have to ask ourselves why is what I am seeing making me so uncomfortable.

Here is what I know… we all have insecurities at one time or another and maybe many have ongoing insecurities. Even those we think have nothing to be insecure about because we see them as perfect. Maybe everyone to some degree that post physique shots has insecurities and posting their physiques serves as form of therapy and helps them remove their insecurities or so they think. Maybe there are physique posters who are, rightfully so, super proud of the bodies they have built and want to motivate others and even help others build their best bodies.

Maybe, just maybe, its all about money. Perhaps this new wave of posters feel they cannot compete with what they feel are “perfect” influencers (again, their opinion) so they are capturing a different market and income source displaying for all to see what they have been insecure about such as cellulite, saddle bags, thick thighs, sagging boobs, stretch marks, belly rolls, love handles etc. Over exaggerating their poses to show their worst.

I find value and motivation from all different influencers I follow. This post is not about hating on any influencer. I admire them all even if for different reasons!

Why is this post so important?

It’s simple, 70% of Americans are over fat, over weight, and/ or obese. We have an epidemic of poor health and fitness.

WIth a current culture of reasons and excuses to remain in poor health and fitness.

And behavior that celebrates and supports those who post nudes and thongs pics or videos that reveal fat, cellulite, saddle bags, thick thighs, sagging boobs, stretch marks, belly rolls, love handles, etc and judges with shame, distaste, and disapproval those that are “everything I’m insecure about”.

We have some work to do #selfcare #selflove #selfesteem #selfconfidence #healthyeating #fitness